After quitting my job and deciding to follow my dream to live abroad and immerse myself in yoga and holistic health practices many people felt compelled to tell me how “lucky” I was. While this is flattering and true, it began to bother me. Chalking up the decision to follow my dreams simply to luck feels like a dismissal of the many obsticals I had to overcome in order to make this happen. It took a lot of preparation, discipline and most of all bravery.
Bravery is the key element because the majority of the obstacles I had to overcome, or you will have to over come if you want to follow your most audacious dreams - are simply within our own mind. When your heart is telling you to do something bold like traveling the world, starting your own company or maybe going back to school, you are stepping into the unknown. You are leaving an element of security to pursue a dream with no guaranteed outcome. Now as alluring as this might be to your heart, it WILL terrify your ego - and in a desperate act to "stay safe" your ego will come up with any, and all excuses to persuade you to back down. These show up as fears and false stories in your mind. So what you need as the best possible defense mechanism is mental strength and clarity. You have more power in these moments than you think, you just need the right tools to unlock it. So here are a few tools that helped me be brave and mentally strong when I didn't think I could.
1.INTERROGATE YOUR FEARS
You can’t begin to image how many fears come up when you decide to do something bold. "Will I regret it? Will everyone think I'm crazy? Will I loose all my money? Will it ruin my relationships? Will my dog hate me?" - You name it and you're ego will create it. Now someone once told me that the bravest people in the world are not void of fear, but instead they know their fears deeply and refuse to allow it to hold them back. So my tip to you is instead of trying to suppress your fears and pretend they don't exist - become intimate with them. Write them down, talk to them and most importantly interrogate them. Really question to see if there is even one ounce of validity because what you will likely discover is that they are all just false stories trying to hold you back and keep you comfortable. Once you see their lack of validity the instantly loose the ability to control you.
2.SWITCH FROM A SCARCITY MENTALITY TO AN ABUNDANCE ONE
Many of us default to thinking their is a finite supply of resources out there for us. There are only so many jobs in the world, so many ways to make money, or so many places to live. These thoughts can be paralyzing and cause us to be closed off to new opportunities and and settle for unsatisfying circumstances. When we think there aren't that many jobs it makes us feel like we have to stay in the one we have even if it makes us miserable. If we think there are no good apartments out there it makes us stay in the place we are in even if our roommate is the worst. When you have a scarcity mentality it makes creating a change in your life feel much more terrifying and risky. But when you switch to a mentality of believing in abundance it makes change feel like this exciting moment full a possibilities. You being to think "If I leave this job imagine all the amazing jobs I COULD have. If I left this apartment there are so many amazing places I could live." It becomes a simple practice that can open you up and turn risk and fear into excitement and possibility.
3. RELEASE THE GUILT OF ASKING FOR HELP
If you are like me, asking for help is never easy. Its vulnerable, uncomfortable and worst of all you can feel like a burden. But in a time when you are ready to do something courageous one of the most helpful things you can do for yourself is build a solid support system. People are intrinsically drawn to those following their hearts and standing in their truth and you'd be surprised to realize how much the people around you genuinely want to support you - even in the smallest way. So get comfortable asking for help. Be okay with someone wanting to lend a hand and trust that they are there for exactly that reason. It is not selfish and you are not a burden - you are simply accepting the kindness you would want to offer someone in the exact same situation.